Mr. Sweeney’s Cat.

Bill Nye   His Book                 1902 Robert Ormsby Sweeney  is  a druggist  of  St. Paul,  and  though  a  recent  chronological record  reveals  the fact  that  he is  a direct descendant  of  a  sure-enough king,  and though  there is  mighty good  purple,  royal blood  in his veins  that  dates back  where  kings  used to have  something  to do  to earn their salary,  he goes right on  with  his  regular business,  selling drugs  at the great sacrifice  which  druggists will make  sometimes  in order  to place their goods  within  the reach of  all.      As soon as  I learned  that  Mr. Sweeney  had  barely escaped  being  a  crowned head,  I  got acquainted  with him  and tried to cheer him up,  and I told him  that people wouldn’t hold him in any way responsible,  and that as it hadn’t shown itself in his family  for years  he  might  perhaps  finally  wear it out.      He is  a  mighty pleasant man  to meet,  anyhow,  and  you can have  just as much fun  with him  as you could  with  a man  who  didn’t have  any  royal blood  in his veins.  You could be  with him  for days  on  a fishing trip  and  never  notice it  at all.      But I was going to speak  more in particular about  Mr. Sweeney’s cat.  Mr. Sweeney had  a large cat,  named  Dr. Mary Walker,  of  which  he was very fond.  Dr. Mary Walker  remained  at the drug store  all the time,  and was known  all over St. Paul  as a quiet and reserved cat.  If  Dr. Mary Walker  took in  the town  after  office hours,  nobody  seemed  to know  anything  about it.  She would  be  around  bright and cheerful  the next morning  and  attend to her duties  at the store  just as though  nothing  whatever  had happened.      One day last summer  Mr. Sweeney  left a large plate of  fly-paper  with  water  on it  in  the window,  hoping  to  gather in  a few quarts  of  flies  in  a  deceased state.  Dr. Mary Walker  used to go  to this window  during the afternoon  and look out  on the busy street  while she called up  pleasant memories of  her past life.  That afternoon  she thought  she would call up some more memories,  so she went over on the counter  and  from there  jumped down  on the window-sill,  landing  with all four feet  in the plate of  fly-paper.      At first she regarded it as a joke,  and treated the matter very lightly,  but later on  she observed that  the fly-paper  stuck to her feet  with great tenacity of  purpose.  Those who have never seen the look of  surprise  and  deep sorrow  that  a cat wears  when she finds herself  glued to  a whole sheet of  fly-paper,  cannot fully appreciate  the way  Dr. Mary Walker felt.  She did not  dash wildly through  a  $150 plate-glass window,  as some cats  would have done.  She controlled herself  and acted  in the coolest manner,  though you could have seen  that mentally  she suffered intensely.  She sat down  a moment  to more fully  outline a plan  for the future.  In  doing so,  she made  a  great mistake.  The gesture  resulted in  glueing  the fly-paper  to  her person  in such a way  that  the edge turned up  behind  in the most abrupt manner,  and caused her  great inconvenience.      Some one  at that time  laughed  in  a coarse  and heartless way,  and  I wish  you could  have seen  the look of  pain  that  Dr. Mary Walker gave him.      Then  she went away.  She did not go around the prescription case  as the rest of  us did,  but  strolled through  the middle of  it,  and  so on  out through the  glass door  at the rear of  the store.  We did not see her  go through  the glass door,  but we found  pieces of  fly-paper and fur  on the ragged edges of  a large aperture  in the glass,  and we kind of  jumped at the conclusion  that Dr. Mary Walker  had taken that direction  in retiring from the room.      Dr. Mary Walker  never returned to  St. Paul,  and  her exact whereabouts  are not known,  though  every effort  was made  to find her.  Fragments of  flypaper and brindle hair  were found  as far west  as the Yellowstone National Park,  and as far north  as the British line,  but the doctor herself  was not found.  My own theory is,  that  if  she turned her bow  to the west  so as to catch  the strong easterly gale  on her quarter,  with the sail  she had set  and  her tail  pointing directly toward  the zenith,  the chances  for  Dr. Mary Walker’s  immediate return  are  extremely slim. LIFE OF SALMON PORTLAND CHASE.  by  J.W. Schuckers.  1874. Page  314.   “The prospect of  a civil war  near at hand  had occasioned a large  falling off  in the  income  from customs,  even  before  Mr. Lincoln’s inauguration.  The  actual presence of  war  operated  still  more calamitously  upon  the revenues  from this Source.”      “Additional methods of  permanent revenue  were necessary;  and accordingly  the  Internal Revenue Bureau  was created  by an act of  Congress,  approved by the President  July 1, 1862.  The germ of  this bureau  will  be found  in the act of  August 5, 1861,”   “for the levy of  a direct tax  of  twenty millions,  and the appointment of  Federal officers  for  its assessment  and collection.” “ The first thing we do,  let’s kill all the lawyers! ” The State of FRANKLIN  was formed in August, 1784.  “A convention met at Jonesboro  and formed a new State,  with a constitution  providing that  lawyers,  doctors and preachers  should never be members of the legislature;  but the people rejected it”.   “The North Carolina act  had subjected them to the payment of taxes  to the United States government.  At the same time,  there was no relaxation of Indian hostilities.  Under these circumstances,  the great body of people  west of the Alleghenies  concluded”  “to adopt a constitution and organize a State government of their own.  This they proceeded to do.”  (McGhee’s History of Tennessee.) “Not until March 31st  did the Assembly remember that the formal ties . . .  with North Carolina  had not yet been  broken.”   “That same day . . .  an act declaring that  Franklin was a free and independent state, . . .”  “Governor Sevier signed the measure that same day.  According to North Carolina wits,  the act did not become law until April 1st,  which,  they declared,  ‘makes Franklin  the biggest April Fools’ Day jest   in all history.’ ” FRANKLIN   America’s  “Lost State”   Page 77.      “Franklinites,  like all Americans,  wanted a sharp division  in the powers of state and church,  so a clause in the permanent constitution  specified that  no minister of the gospel  could hold a seat in the state legislature  or accept public office.  At the same time, however,  every citizen was guaranteed full religious liberty  and the right to worship as he pleased. The Reverend Hezekiah Balch and the Reverend Samuel Houston  (uncle of the future Governor of Tennessee),  took exception to that clause  in the proposed constitution. Page 78.  “The two ministers  launched a furious attack on the provision,  and some of the more devout delegates supported them.  Their stand  drove the advocates of the separation of state  and church powers  into a frenzy,  and the debate became violent.  Men exchanged personal insults  on the floor of the convention,  challenged each other to duels  and  on two or three occasions  had fist fights.” Page 79.  “When the issue was put to a vote,  the advocates of the separation of church and state  won an easy victory.” The  “oldest authentic copy  of the Constitution of the United States”  was discovered  “In the winter of 1983.”  “This document included a 13th Amendment  that no longer appears on current copies of the Constitution.”   “The principle intent of this  ‘Missing’ 13th Amendment,  was to prohibit lawyers from serving in government.” TaxJudas.com Gold reserve  to pay off United States notes. Presidential Candidates  favor Inflationary Silver  and  “Cross of  Gold”  speech. Isonomia.US  LandGrab.US  Eminent Domain -  Condemnation: reduces  Private Property  to a priviledge, and creates Nomads. Why  the Republican Party Elected Lincoln Kenny saw— Big Shanty!